False Appearances

[Oliver Queen]

Oliver was working late. This time, it wasn't as The Arrow, but rather . . . as Oliver Queen CEO. Between everything else that was happening, he had fallen behind in his work and needed to spend tonight catching up on what he could, before he switched gears and went on the streets to fulfill his role as the vigilante. With Sara here now . . . he had that help that he had never had before. He had tried to train those in the past, and was still in the process of training some now . . . but Sara knew exactly what to do. He couldn't be more glad that she was here. Not only in Starling, but with him. If there was anyone who could ever understand what he had been through, it was her. And vice versa. They understood each other; they had shared similar experiences . . . and now, they could be together and enjoy that connection, though he would forever wish he could have done more to spare her from what she'd been through. He quickly snapped out of these thoughts, realizing he was getting distracted again.

He knew that all this, immersing himself in both jobs, was his way of avoiding the bigger issue. Avoiding being home. And most importantly, avoiding his mother. That thought, was always on his mind no matter what he did to try and push it to the back. He could fight crime as the vigilante, he could be here in meetings, he could be training, he could find comfort with Sara . . . but in that second he was left alone, with nothing to distract his mind, it always went back to the same thought: that his mother had lied about Thea. Thea would always be a sister to him regardless of whatever genetics may suggest this was only half true. But that didn't mean the truth didn't hurt. That it hadn't broken his heart. For that, he would never forgive his mother, and hated this whole sham of a family that they had to keep up. But for Thea's sake, they had no choice. He forced himself back to concentrating on his paper work . . . if only to push these thoughts away again.

Location: At Queen Consolidated Headquarters
Time of Day: Night Time
Timeline: After Heir To The Demon
Tag: Moira Queen

[Moira Queen]

Moira knew Oliver was mad at her for betraying his father, and not telling Thea, or Oliver the truth about Thea's father. In the efforts to try and save her family Moira headed back over to Queen Consolidated Headquarters where she was told he would be earlier that day by Felicity. Moira walked back into the elevator, arriving at the floor where Oliver's office was. Moira took a quick breath in... and out as she stepped out of the elevator knowing that Oliver wasn't going to be very happy about her being at his work. She knew he'd probably say something to hurt her, but she needed to hear it. She needed to hear how Oliver felt, and how she could be a better Mother. 

Moira stepped into the foyer of Oliver's office aware that he could probably see, and hear her through the glass door. When she arrived at his office door, she saw that he was very involved with his work, barely noticing that Moira was standing outside his office. She thought about turning back around, and leaving. She knew Oliver had a lot of work to do, and she didn't want to make him even more furious by distracting him; but she quickly decided against it, knowing she needed to have this conversation with him. Moira knocked on the glass door, trying to get Oliver's attention, once his eyes met hers she held up a paper bag. "I brought you dinner. I figured if you were anything like your father, you probably hadn't eaten all day, seeing you're incredibly busy with your work."

[Oliver Queen]

It took Oliver a few moments to realize exactly who was standing there. And part of him wished he had not looked up. But he did, and his gaze rested on none other, but Moira Queen. He looked at her, using all the strength within him to withhold any emotion from being detected on his face. It still hurt to see her. Still caused his heart to ache every single time he was forced to converse with her. He hated what happened between them, but there was nothing he could do to change it. He glanced at the bag she held up, saying that she had brought him dinner. There it was. That Moira Queen that gave everyone the impression that she was a kind, carring, compassionate woman. All the traits of a wonderful mother. The parts of her that had made Oliver continuously give her chance after chance. But no more. He was done. She was fooling everyone, and she had fooled him long enough. He was not going to succumb to all these false characteristics she projected to everyone else. He would no longer be that naive.

He looked back down at his paper work, acting as if he was able to immediately immerse himself in it, when really, he wasn't even reading the words on the page. He was just staring at them, trying to ignore her presence, but that was impossible. "I'm not hungry," he stated bluntly. Stubbornly. He was not going to accept anything from her. Not food. Not any maternal love she had to offer. Because he knew that, it was a falsity. "You can go," he added dismissively. There was no one else around. He didn't have to act like the loving and supportive son. This was the reality of their relationship, and while he would always wish that it was not so . . . he wasn't going to do anything to change it.

[Moira Queen]

Moira watched as Oliver's head dropped back down to his paperwork. Moira's heart broke a little more every time he ignored her, but she couldn't blame him. "Don't be foolish Oliver, you need to eat." Moira said as she walked through the glass door, over to Oliver placing the brown paper bag on his desk. Moira decided to cut straight to the chase. She knew Oliver wouldn't stand for her presence any longer than he had to. She sat down in the chair directly in front of Oliver, and for a moment she just let the silence engulf them. She had a hard time finding her words but eventually spoke up.

"Oliver... I know you're not happy with me, and I understand why, I would hate myself too if I were in your shoes." Moira paused again. "You know that I didn't tell you because I wanted to avoid a situation like this, but here we are. I'm sorry that I didn't tell you sooner about Thea and Malcolm. I thought I had put it in the past, where it belongs." Moira reached for Oliver's hand. "I've changed, and grown since my affair with Malcolm, and since the undertaking. I hope that one day you can understand that. I don't want our family to be divided like this, and I would love if you would come home and be with us as a family." Moira sat in silence, waiting for Oliver to say something, anything at all. 

[Oliver Queen]

She called him foolish and came to set the bag down on his desk. But he still refused to eat it. Stubborness was a trait that ran in the family. Or whatever word could be used to describe what they were amidst all these broken relationships between them. He still didn't look up at her. Not when she had put the food near him. Not when she stood there. And not when she took a seat across from him. He wanted to tell her to leave again, but he knew that wasn't going to happen. His mother was relentless. Which was perhaps another characteristic he had gotten from her. In this particular instance however, he wished she wasn't. He let the silence linger between them, not meeting her gaze, though he could feel her eyes on him. He had nothing to say to her, yet when those moments of silence -- which felt like an eternity -- ended, she seemed to have a lot to say to him. Empathy for starters. Stating that she too would hate herself if she was in his position. Then came the justification for her lies. She had it then: it was to protect him and Thea. Everything she did centered around this notion of protecting them, protecting her 'family'.

It wasn't until she reached for his hand, that his gaze averted from the papers to where her hand reached out for his. He didn't move. In fact, he kept looking at it. To say that it was easy to cut her off like this was a lie. She had been a woman he'd called mother for twenty eight years of his life. A woman who had expressed love and all the nurturing qualities that an ideal mother should possess. To dismiss all that, and practically disown her was hard. But she had given him a strong reason to and that was what fueled his anger and hurt for what she had done. That was what kept him firm in his decision to have no relationship with her. Her words processed in his mind, hearing that familiar silence once again when she finished. At which point, he pulled his hand from her and pushed his chair back, needing to maintain what distance from her he could.

He finally brought his eyes to her own, forcing himself not to be fooled by that look in her eyes; by that attempt at sincerity. How many times had she roped him back in to continue this charade? He needed to remind himself of that. Perhaps that was why he needed distnace from her as well . . . so that he wouldn't fall back into her trap. "You haven't changed," he stated, unwavering in his mindset. "I thought you did. I wanted to believe you did." He wasn't doing this to be malicious. He did this, because she had done something that to him, was unforgivable. Unable to grant himself the comfort of sitting, he rose to his feet and walked toward the window, his back half turned toward her. Once again, he was looking outside but not really seeing as his mind clouded his sense of sight right now.

"You destroyed our family," he told her. He was aware that these words could be considered harsh, but they needed to be said. Because he was done playing her game. "With your lies and deceit," he continued, not bothering to hold anything back in this moment. He slowly turned his head to look at her, knowing that his attempt to withhold any emotion was slipping as the pain and anger were starting to become evident. "You say you would do the same if you were in my position. Then tell me, would you forgive as well?" He was giving context. She attempted to sound empathetic, as if she could understand and relate. But then what would she do? Would she forgive in that situation? Part of him expected her to say something to benefit herself in this situation. So he wasn't going to change his mind based on his answer. He only said it, to give context.

[Moira Queen]

"You destroyed our family" Those words hit Moira hard, especially since she didn't mean to. Moira would be the first to admit to, and own up to her mistakes. "Oliver..." She said with a concerning, and apologetic voice. "I never intended to break this family apart. I never wanted my past, or my decisions to affect you and Thea. That was never my intentions, but I've realized the mistakes I've made and I'm trying to become a better Mother, I really am Oliver." Moira heard things coming out of Oliver's mouth that stunned her. She never thought her son could be so cruel towards the woman whom gave him life. Moira watched Oliver walk over to the window, and blow after blow, Oliver was firing at her. These weren't just attacks of love, of hope that she would change, these were personal blows. Shots that Oliver were firing at her because he wanted her out of his life. "Would you forgive as well?" Oliver asked her. Moira sat in silence for a little while, trying to think of a way to answer the question. "If I were in your shoes, would I forgive me? Is that what you want to know?" Moira looked down, fumbling with her hands. 

"No." Moira looked up, trying to read the expression on Oliver's face. Ever since he came back from the island, Moira was never able to tell what her son was thinking. He had changed so much, Moira wasn't even sure he was her son anymore. The son sh knew would never have left her side through all of this. Moira stood up from her seat. "No, I wouldn't forgive me. Not at first, but eventually I would come around, just as I did when you and Laurel started dating." Moira walked over to where Oliver was standing, and leaned against the edge of the windowsill. "I know you're stubborn Oliver. What side of the family do you think you got that from." Moira said, smiling the smallest of smiles, trying to lighten the mood. "And I don't expect you to understand. But one day, when you have a family of your own you may understand when you have to lie to them in order to protect them."

[Oliver Queen]

It was never her intention. Nothing was ever her intention. Not when she had lied about his father, now when she had lied about her involvement with the Undertaking, not with this. It was never her intention to tear the family apart. But she had. Because Oliver didn't know how he could possibly forgive her. Not this time. "And I've tried to understand that," he told her, his words still cold, still lacking any warmth. "Because I have stood by you, time and time again." Until now. This had been the last straw for him. Because . . . it was Thea. And as if that wasn't enough, which it certainly was, but it was about Tommy too. About Malcom. About his father. So many people were involved in this and Oliver couldn't -- wouldn't -- accept any justification for this lie. "But I am done trying to understand your reasons and accepting your justifications for your actions." Because this one just hurt too much. This lie, was not one he would ever move past. And it broke his heart. Oliver had to admit that he was surprised when she said that she would not have forgiven her had she been in his position . . . but he kept his expression guarded, not wanting her to catch wind of any reaciton he had to her words.

But she went on to tell him that she would eventually come around. He found that har to believe. Then again, he found anything she said hard to believe. He assumed her saying that was part of his previous thought; that she would say whatever she could to benefit herself. That was after all what she was best at doing. But all other words were temporarily set aside when she mentioned Laurel. The subject of Laurel was one that Oliver never brought up. Because that was another relationship that was draining every part of his being. He had loved her, but he was tired. Tired of chasing after her. Tired of trying to help her. Which . . . was all to familiar now. "Do not compare this to my relationship with Laurel," he said, his tone angry without raising the volume of his voice. He would not let her do that. Not let her accepting him and Laurel, compare to him forgiving her lies about Thea. She came closer to him again, and attempted to lighten the mood. The word family was becoming more and more of a false term. Because what defined a family, was all that they currently lacked in theirs.

She was probably right. He most likely did get his stubborness from her. But he would not let her know that. He wouldn't give her that, or anything, to encourage a relationship or connection between them. So he remained silent, unamused by her attempt to help lighten the weight that had formed on their shoulders. It was her last words that really captured his focus. Because . . . well, he was lying too. Not only to Thea about this, but most everyone. His motives for lying were completely different though. When he'd taken the hood and become a vigilante, he had come to terms with the fact that he would have to lie to his family on a daily basis. It was for the best, he knew that. But hearing his mother speak of lying to protect his family . . . he knew about that all too well. And he hated that they had sometihng like that in common; something like that which he could relate to. But no. It was different. In his mind, in his heart and soul, he knew it was different.

"Don't play this role of a protective mother," he told her. "It may have worked the first few times, but not this time." He looked at her, after having avioded eye contact once again. He could feel the pain and hurt over everything, really start to seep through his gaze, and he found himself fighting to hold back the tears. "How could you do this?" He asked somewhat rhetorically, shaking his head. He looked away, physically unable to look at her in that moment because of the disgrace. How could she do this. How could she do this to Thea? Thea had been through so much. She was everything to Oliver. The moment someone did anything to hurt her, he was there and continued to fight to protect her. He just would never have accepted that one person who had the power to destroy her . . . would be their own mother.